As I go on week four of feeling the pregnancy nausea that seems to go on forever and allows for my couch to be in almost constant contact with my butt I received a wonderful gift today from my friend Beth.
Every once in a while you meet someone who is wise enough to look up to and admire for the choices they make. Beth is one of those people for me.
After having much relieve and comfort when my mom came up this weekend I wasn't sure how I would even get through the week with Nate at work and my mom back home. Somehow I managed to get to today, Friday.
I won't make this a long post because, to be quite honest, I'm not much for sitting at the computer these days. I just wanted to put this day out there because I appreciated the positive encouragement I received from two positive women in my life this week.
I reflected today on Charly's and Piper's birth and remembered how present and yet how invisible my mom was for both births. She really understands what I needed and gave it to me selflessly. As I watched Piper's birth video (which BTW still brings back the pain) I noticed how involved my mom was without me even noticing it. I wonder, could I do it without her?
Even the time she spent this weekend, although short, she has so much compassion for me and understands what I'm feeling. I never have to ask her to do something, she just knows and does it.
Today through Beth's great conversation I was reminded of how grateful I am to my mom for being that role model in my life for how to treat our babies and the whole birthing process.
It makes me sad to think of the mom I would have been had my own mom not had asked me this simple question upon finding out we were expecting Charly....
"You're going to do Natural childbirth right?"
This simple thought started it all for me and brought me to where I am now.
I just really needed the chat I had today with Beth. It is always so wonderful to meet someone who you can share birth stories with and gather strength from their experiences.
I can see the distant light at the end of the 'vomit' tunnel I am in and so much look forward to meeting this new person growing inside of me.
Nate and I still haven't officially picked a midwife yet, we should have a decision made next week when we have the insurance figured out. As of now they are paying %65 but we are working with a billing company to change that since there aren't any in network homebirth midwives. Keep us in your prayers/thoughts, while we surely would not question a homebirth based on money, we definitely could think of a lot more things 1,800 dollars could go towards especially since our insurance would be willing to pay %100 of a hospital birth which is by far more expensive.
Next Friday we will be at a point in the pregnancy where the heartbeat can be heard and we are very excited for that day.
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