Good ole times

Blog disclaimer: This post's direction is not to discredit any friendships I have made while in HG, it is no secret that I have met some pretty amazing people while living here and formed lasting relationships. Re-reading this I realize it sounds negative but I assure you my intent is not to offend anyone around me, it is so hard to read someone's tone over type *sigh*

Today was the kind of day a girl needs every so often, and that girl that needed it today would be me. Lately I have been feeling discouraged about the lack of support in HG for our lifestyle. I have been 'homesick' for Utah (I know right?!!!) and even New Mexico were I made connections with friends who were like minded and didn't question our choices, yet they embraced them for they were making these same choices. I never realized how wonderful it was to be around those people until five months pregnant I am scared that it may just be Nate and I in this journey with our third(perhaps that will be a good thing). Of course my family is near but it's not like they live right down the street and to have local support (attachment parenting groups, LLL etc...) is a blessing we may not have this time around.

It may seem weird but I find thinking about when this baby comes and things as simple as how I will feel nursing in church, will I be ostracized? I question where I should sway from my own beliefs and where I would just be being stubborn. This whole public nursing thing is huge for me. I completely get that people may be uncomfortable with public baby feedings but at the same time we don't want to send the message to our daughters that it is something to be ashamed about or immodest. In my mind it sends a backward message to children to put nursing mothers in hiding. I'm completely overwhelmed with this topic and others that make Nate and I different. Thank goodness I have him who is as much as an advocate for our children as I am. He gets it and I know that is really all that matters, I have to just push the other worries to the side. I'm working on that.

Because I have had these concerns on my mind today was even that much greater. The girls and I went to my best friend Sally's house where our other BFF, Sara from HS, came with her girls to play. I have been thinking about them a lot and how over the years we have always had a bond. I have known these girls for 13 years! We have always had different ideas on certain things but have never let them come between us. Today was no different either, we can have a political discussion and five minutes later be joking about something completely unrelated. Funny thing about Sara(far left), she grew up in the LDS church and in HS I was "atheist". I was probably the last of our group of friends she would ever thought 10 years later she would be having church discussion with. I love these girls!!

No matter how much time goes in between seeing each other Charly and Layla pick up right where they left off, it's easy to see they will be lifelong friends like Sally and I.  They are such great friends Charly let her pay in chuck e cheese money for the bookmarks she was selling for $2, too cute!  Below is the whole gang (minus Piper). Seven kids with one more on the way is not so bad for three friends.

After having my cell by my side all day with the small chance I may hear from Nate I was very excited to see he had emailed me when I got to my mom's house. He arrived to Bosnia safely but as we expected the internet is sparse and may be our only form of communication for the next 12 days which is really sad for me. The whole time we have been together there has never been a day where we couldn't at least talk on the phone while we were apart from each other. I knew I would miss him but not hearing his voice today has been hard on my heart, we always exchange 'I love yous' at every conversation. I keep thinking he is going to call so I will hear mine for the day. This is going to be a long period of time for us. It certainly seems so far that when he gets back we will have tons to fill each other in on and I can't wait!